“God knows of your troubles; He keeps a record of your tears."
~ Psalm 56:8
Seven short weeks ago, Willie’s
life changed forever. The woman he
married years ago, the one with big eyes and a bigger heart had gone home to
their heavenly Father; the victim of a distracted teenaged driver. He was now both Mommy and Daddy to his two small
children.
After their baths, he’d given each the prescribed five
minute back rubs. Then Willie took up
his guitar and began the nighttime ritual of folk songs, ending with "Jesus
Loves You," - their favorite. He sang
it over and over, gradually lowering both volume and tempo until they fell asleep.
This is how it’d always been … with the exception that their
Mommy was now gone. Willie rose cautiously,
trying to avoid making the slightest noise which might wind them up again, begging
for more songs and stories.
He tiptoed downstairs and slumped into his favorite armchair. For the first time tonight, Willie had some
time to himself. He’d cooked and done
the dishes while responding to their endless demands for attention. He helped his oldest with her second grade
homework and ‘oohed’ shamelessly over his son’s elaborate Lego blocks creation.
The loneliness was overwhelming.
Unexpected tears trickled off his cheeks as he tried masking
his grief. There was a rawness to it; pain
from a still-open wound. Then his whole
body shook; validating his devastating loss.
As he sobbed silently in the darkened room, a little face
peered up at him. He looked down into his
four-year-old son's sympathetic face.
"It's okay to cry, Daddy. My Sunday School teacher says that tears are
prayers too. They travel to God when we
can’t speak.”
He climbed into Willie’s lap and they hugged for a long
while before Daddy tucked his son back into bed. Then he thanked God for the wisdom of
innocence that had given him permission to cry, releasing him from his grief
and reaffirming his ability to love and be loved.
In ancient times, tears shed for the death of a friend were
captured in small vials, or ‘tear bottles’ and offered on the tomb of the
deceased. What a sweet thought is
suggested (Psalm 56:8 above) by God's recognition of our afflictions! He’s present with every tear shed; we can
count on Him to collect them all. No
matter what sorrows we face today, we have confidence that God cares.
Lord Jesus, thank You for loving my babies even
more than I do and for having compassion on them and me. Help me feel Your comfort and reassurance
when I face new seasons of life and emotional challenges as both a father and
mother. Please guide them in their
decisions and keep them safe. Love
Willie
