On Belay

“Mountains may crumble, but His love for you will never end.”  ~ Isaiah 54:10

Lisa wiped sweaty palms on her unblemished climbing pants.  The ringing in her ears and thumping from her chest screamed panic at her first rock climbing attempt.

She hadn’t been keen on trying it, but her boyfriend Tyler insisted.  “You’ll be surprised at how it’ll boost your confidence for other things.  Besides, you might even like it!” he claimed.  Swinging precariously from a rope off a cliff didn’t sound like her idea of fun, but his persistence paid off.

They both treasured Colorado’s Rocky Mountains - but for different reasons.  Tyler craved the thrills availed by nature’s peaks: hang gliding, climbing and heli-skiing.  Lisa, on the other hand, found that photography often provided a similar adrenalin rush.

Apprehensively, she stepped into the climbing harness and adjusted her helmet.  The belay rope, secured to the rock and the instructor at the top, was secured to the harness.  It seemed safe enough, but she was still fearful.  How could she have convinced herself that this might be fun?

Delicate fingers clamped onto a narrow ledge overhead just as a rock below her fell away.  After climbing about 30 feet, Lisa was ready to climb back down.  But she said a short prayer instead: “God, I’m scared and I don’t know the way up this mountain.  But I know You’re up there, and You have me “on belay.”

“Don’t get discouraged!” the instructor called down.  “It’s actually easier to keep going forward.”  And so she did … until eventually Lisa crawled over the cliff top – exhilarated, exhausted, and amazed.  “I knew you could do it!” Tyler shouted from below.

Lisa stood atop the rocky cliff, arms raised in victory.   When she looked down at the dizzying drop, nothing met her gaze but flat clouds hiding the treasure of their landscape below.

"I did it," she whispered to herself, lips chattering but curving proudly upward.  "I climbed to the top of the world!"

Many years later, Tyler was killed by a distracted driver in a head-on collision.  When the shocking news came in the middle of the night, Lisa felt as if she’d been kicked in the gut.  Hanging up the phone, her mind flashed back to that summer adventure in Colorado.

“God, I’m terrified, and I don’t know the way up this mountain.   But I know You’re up there, and You have me “on belay.

To the faithful like Lisa, there are no hopeless situations.  Futility only happens when we find ourselves at the end of our rope; where there’s no confidence in a positive outcome.

With God, there are no unfair situations over which you can’t prevail; no dreams too far-fetched or difficulties that can’t be successfully removed from your path.  He promises that those who seek Him will lack no good thing.

Precious Lord, sometimes it feels like You’ve left us in the battle; like our pleadings seem to go unanswered.  Help us trust You in the midst of our uncertainties, our questions, and our aloneness.  Amen

Cyber Addiction

“Encourage one another with your words and actions." ~ 1 Thessalonians 4:18 

Brooke had all the usual sign of addiction – the need for more to get the same effect, careless obsession, and excessive misuse when feeling anxious or depressed.  Add to that list tension, irritability, and anger when faced with withdrawal.

Neither heroin nor cocaine had robbed her of personality.  The evil culprit was a cell phone.

Brooke got her first taste of social media at a friend’s house at age 10 and received an iPhone of her own for her 11^th birthday.  She quickly became obsessed with it and social media.

Brooke continually refreshed her shallow posts, often staying up until 4:00 in the morning.  Facebook, Twitter and Snapchat further fueled her narcissistic impulses.  She couldn’t put the phone down … it became part of her.

As her exposure to the internet increased, Brooke’s parents noticed that she became increasingly ill-tempered at home.  Taking away the phone didn’t help; Brooke quickly found other ways to ‘feed’ her addiction.  Their previously healthy relationship dissolved.  They were no longer a source of support and encouragement but simply a means to provide food, shelter and money (for the latest iPhone upgrade).

“At least at home she’s safe,” they reasoned - a naive sense of security as they found out when a cyber-patrol officer showed up at their home.  The officer informed them that Brooke was involved in a dangerous online relationship with a known predator.  He’d been blackmailing their daughter for obscene pictures of her.

Brooke was immediately committed to a Residential Treatment Center specializing in mental health issues related to the excessive use of mobile devices and social media.  The first thing they took away was her phone.

It was tough at first not knowing what her friends were up without feeling like she was missing out.  But over time, she’s become less attached.    “My phone” became “the phone” reverting back to being a piece of furniture like “the fridge” or “the couch,” two other items you also wouldn’t carry around on your butt.

In her words: “I’m less distracted and less accessible.  I can’t be bothered unless I choose to be!”

Brooke has been ‘clean’ for 21 months and 5 days and doing great.  She doesn’t miss important invitations and no longer feels the pangs of her own insecurities; not small victories in a world where constant communication isn’t just a convenient accessory - it’s a second skin.

“I get more sleep now.  I look people in the eye.  I eat food instead of photographing it and am not driving half a ton of metal into oncoming traffic while looking down at a tiny screen,” she said.  I’m glad to be back in the world again.  It beats waiting for an alert telling me that I exist.”

Lord, “I know firsthand that the most challenging aspect of lasting recovery is fighting the temptation to return to my addiction.  Please help me; especially in those moments when fighting the beast of Internet addiction is hardest.” ~ Brooke

Shifting Sand

“Let nothing separate what God has joined together." ~ Matthew 19:6

Make no mistake; Lucille hadn’t passed away, at least in body.  But the scourge of Alzheimer’s had left her barely recognizable to her friends.  But her husband Ruben loved her just as much as the day in 1943 when they were married.

They’d known each other almost their whole lives.  She was literally, the girl next store!

Diagnosed with Alzheimer’s many years ago, she suffered frequent disorientation, mood swings and aphasia which impaired her ability to remember what occurred from one day to the next.  Yet, he listened patiently when she talked, rambled, and tried to reminisce, treasuring those few times when she remembered something, no matter how fleeting it was.

Ruben helped compensate for her diminishing abilities while always trying to ensure the respect that had defined their relationship for over 75 years.  Times were not easy, but they persevered through tears with laughter; sorrow with joy, and always filled with LOVE.

He admitted the difficulties of watching the love of his life fade away, but Ruben made a daily effort to remind Lucy how much he appreciated her.  "Every time I saw her, I told her how magnificent her smile was; what a great life we had together, and thanked her for all she’d given me.”

Recently they lived in separate rooms at a nursing home.  Not because Ruben was no longer able to care for his dear wife; he was still Lucy’s primary care giver.  He kept her safe and free from worries, responsibilities, and fears.  They lived separately because Lucy started claiming that they weren’t married anymore.

One day Lucy looked at Ruben through silvery tears.  In a barely audible voice she whispered, “I think it’s time you marry me Ruben.”

For moment he was speechless.  “But of course, my darling, I'd be delighted to marry you.”

Ruben wasn’t sure Lucy would remember because of her chronic memory loss.  But the next morning at breakfast, she recalled everything and couldn’t wait for their wedding day.  So he decided to tie the knot (again) the following weekend.

Sweet Lucy passed away the day before the (re)wedding.

So instead of gathering to witness their renewal ceremony, family and friends filled the church to memorialize Lucy’s life.  Sometimes the Pastor explained, “God provides living angels to inspire those who face adversity in their own marriages.  Their love was in kind deeds, thoughtful actions, trustworthiness and self-sacrifice - especially in times of trouble, of hardship and failing health. It transcends time, distance and even mortality.”

We can’t fully appreciate the graces reaped by the example of this loving couple.  And if you’re not quite there yet, don’t give up.  Have full confidence that God will help you get there!”

Lord, it’s hard to watch my loved one decline.  Give me strength during difficult caregiving situations and protect me from discouragement. Give me a willing spirit to see things from different perspectives so I may grow come closer to You.   Amen

The Perfect Dress

“This is the day that the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it." ~ Psalm 118:24

Woody sank into the designated chair and waited impatiently.  He allowed his mind to briefly wander down nostalgia boulevard.

In his late twenties, he met the woman of his dreams.  Soon came Myra, their beautiful little girl.

The hectic life of a toddler gave way to more temperamental ‘tween’ years.  He’d sooner forget most of those days ...  except of course the Daddy Daughter Dances.  That night itself was special, but spending a day alone with his little princess - shopping for the perfect gown, shoes and purse - gave Woody an even greater sense of pure joy.

They started early with heaps of whipped cream on blueberry pancakes.  Then off to the first of several dress shops.  Woody loved the way her face changed when she slipped into the right gown; the way hopes and dreams illuminated her eyes.   She always assembled the perfect ensemble.

He still saw that little girl in her frilly dress.  Ebony curls framed a childish face with eyes that shined like sapphires and a smile as sweet as lilacs.  Hopefully, he prayed, she’d carry the value of their time spent together, the memories created, and lessons learned, for a lifetime.

Woody casually wiped away tears streaking down his face; his chin trembled like a small child.  He gazed toward the window as if light could transport him back in time.

Through misty eyes, he saw her again … older now … modeling a wedding dress.  Everyone knows that Moms plan the wedding, so he hadn’t expected to be consulted on much beyond the budget.

Yet to his delight and shock, Myra asked him to take her dress shopping … one more time.

In a spacious sunlit studio, she tried on her first-ever wedding dress: a high-neck, sleeveless gown with a full skirt.  After looking at Woody, she pronounced: “Nope!”  It looked nice, but the neckline was too high and its skirt too full.

Number two had long lace sleeves.  She’d fallen in love with it in the catalogue; one that Mom absolutely adored.  Myra stared in the mirror, then looked out her Dad.  “No!” she mouthed again.

When the assistant pulled back the curtain for a third time, Myra looked fabulous.  “Frankly, she’d have looked magnificent in a Pizza Hut table cloth,” he thought trying to curb his enthusiasm.

Her big brown eyes met Woody’s as she squeezed his hand.  “This is IT! Daddy,” she announced triumphantly.  “I know I found the right dress because I can always see it on your face.”

Woody offered a silent thank-you to the mother who, by letting Myra go, allowed her to be his at the precious time when she said yes to the dress.

Lord, teach me to offer You a heart of thanksgiving in all my daily experiences.  Teach me to be joyful always, to pray continually and to give thanks in all my circumstances.  I accept them as Your will for my life.  Amen

Escape From the Battlefield

“As iron sharpens iron, so a friend sharpens a friend." ~ Proverbs 27:17

A grandson of slaves, he was raised in a New Orleans ward so treacherous it was called “The Battlefield.”  There prostitution, gambling, and drunkenness were as frequent as the sunrise.

When his father abandoned the family, the boy dropped out of elementary school to help support his mother’s meager income as a prostitute.  Talk about a difficult childhood!

A family of Jewish immigrants took pity on the 7-year-old boy, hiring him as a coal delivery boy, and soon took the starving child under their wing.   The Karnofskys also experienced the ungodly treatment by “other white folks” who felt they were better than the Jews.  For the first time in his life he was treated with kindness.  He’d wear a Star of David pendant for the rest of his life to honor the Lithuanian family who taught him about courage and determination.

Even at an early age he proved to be gifted in music, singing on the streets of the Big Easy for spare coins.  His broad smile earned him the nickname "Satchel Mouth.”  He didn’t receive any formal musical training until age 11, when he was arrested for firing a pistol in the air during a New Year’s Eve celebration.

The crime earned him a stint in a detention facility called the Colored Waif’s Home for Boys.  There, under the tutelage of Peter Davis, he learned how to play the cornet, eventually becoming the leader of the Waif’s Home Brass Band.

Released from the Waif’s Home 18 months later, he set his sights on becoming a professional musician.  While he still had to work odd jobs selling newspapers and hauling coal in the city’s famed red-light district, the kid became fascinated by the bands playing in the brothels and dance halls.

One of the greatest cornet players in town, Joe ‘King’ Oliver noted his surprising talent and began mentoring him; occasionally even using him as a sub.  He quickly began earning a reputation as an accomplished blues player.

You might recognize his name.

That little boy was Louis "Satchmo" Armstrong.  “Satchmo” had been truncated from “Satchel Mouth” when a London writer mistakenly contracted the two words after meeting Armstrong.  The rest, they say, is musical History.

But none of his fame could have been possible without the help of strangers.  From the Karnofskys who loaned young Louis money to buy his first ($5) cornet, to the various musicians who guided his musical career, they formed the backbone behind his dream.

They helped paved the path and provided the direction that pointed him towards his vision.  They also helped him make important connections.

There are lives out there waiting to be impacted by YOU.  Feel the fear … and do it anyway!

My Lord and Mentor, how blessed I am for Your friendship and guidance.  And as is the case of mentorship, I can never repay You -except by mentoring and pouring my life into young people who come into my own life.  Amen

Soft on the Inside

“Keep your promises even when it hurts." ~ Psalm 15:4

“Don’t forget to go get Davey’s clothes, Daddy!” Aayla said as she scampered down the driveway toward the school bus.  In that purple shirt and jeans she could’ve been anyone, or no-one.  But to Terry, her stepdad, she was the world itself after his wife died unexpectedly.

Last night, while cooking dinner, Aayla asked him: “Dad, will you take Davey with you tomorrow, wherever you go?”  It was the first time he remembered her calling him ‘Dad.’

Like most busy parents trying to keep up a dialogue while preparing dinner, Terry answered “Sure!” without full realizing what he’s said.  When she became visibly excited he knew he was all-in.

“Daaaaady,” she continued by upping the ante.  “Can you also buy Davey some clothes?  He doesn’t have any that fit right."

The demands kids place on parents range from the necessary (“Wipe my nose!”) to the ridiculous (“Pick the raisins from my cereal!”).  But we can all agree that a promise is an obligation, especially if they don’t forget and constantly remind us.

So this heavily tattooed Dad whose work shirt was adorned with the nickname ‘Punisher’ went to the garage and began searching for a car seat.  At some point during dinner, he remembered Aayla reminding him that Davey needed to be strapped in.  “Because, you know … safety.”

The man whose exterior screamed manliness lifted Davey from his crib, placed him in the car seat, and drove to the store.  Once inside they grabbed a cart and approached a young sales person.

“Miss, where are your clothes for little babies?” he asked.

Imagine the confusion as the doe-eyed clerk stared at the burly, 6’2”, seriously inked man pushing what was clearly a doll strapped into his cart (safety first).  Appearances may often be deceiving, but her puzzled look seemed quite legit.

She kindly directed Terry to the baby clothes area.  He rejected several ill-fitting outfits before making his way to the cash register with a few perfect choices.  If Terry was embarrassed at all, it didn’t show.

Having been issued a challenge by his daughter, this tough-looking guy delivered big time.  Terry wanted Aayla to know that she was special; that she could always trust and believe in him.

If that’s not great parenting – I’m not sure what qualifies.

It’s a lot like our Creator God’s love for us.  We can only hope to imitate his parenting skills.

He knows us having shaped us.  He provides for us, loves us unconditionally, and longs for engaging relationships with us.  He forgives our many sins, clothes us with new identity, and guarantees an abundant life to those who believe in Him.

God never made a promise that was too good to be true; or one He didn’t keep.  Perfect nurturing!

Heavenly Father, thank You for revealing Yourself as the ultimate promiser, in whom I can completely trust.  Help me to honor all my commitments, even when it’s difficult, expensive, or inconvenient.  Amen