“In His hand is the life of every living thing and the breath of all human beings." ~ Job 12:10
December arrived like his mood – grey and cold. Most of the
leaves had fallen from the trees leaving only ashen skeletons in the
surrounding mountains. Jason hated waking up. He didn’t want to move at all. It
took all his strength to conjure up a single positive vibe.
The older he got the less he
enjoyed winter. Christmas was coming but after that, a long, gloomy, freezing
winter would arrive that he dreaded.
As a boy, Jason loved playing in
the snow, making snow angels, having snowball fights, and then curling up with his
dog by the fireplace and reading a favorite book. Now the days meant shorter
daylight, shoveling snow, navigating slick roads, and feeling the freezing wind
burn his face.
Jason first began experiencing
anxiety and depression at age 14 after being bullied at school for years. While
at first it would come and go, Mixed Anxiety-Depressive Disorder (MADD)
eventually became a constant presence in his life. It was like a perpetual
cough that started getting better, only to come back worse than before.
Unlike a cough, MADD hit like a heavyweight
body blow - even the goal of getting out of bed seemed less and less
attainable. Most of his days began like today, paralyzed by endless thoughts of
hopelessness and fear.
He sighed and fell back down in
bed, a gloom settling over his spirit, wishing he could stay under the covers
and sleep until Spring. That's when he came face to face with Corgi who’d
jumped up on Jason’s bed, glaring at him with eager eyes.
“Is that how I look right now?” he asked.
Corgi broke into a delirious,
panting grin as if to say, "It's no time for sadness, the world’s
awesome!" She snuggled in as Jason looked up to heaven and thanked God for
the grace this loving, little pup brought.
He jumped out of bed. Donning
winter apparel that had hung idly in the coat closet, Jason walked in the snow
with his new best friend. Walking down the street in sub-zero weather, he
realized his life was changing. A new beginning, the missing puzzle piece.
Corgi reminded him that the
world is our mirror. We can either be a reflection of light or a shadow of
darkness; either be a beacon of love or a greyness of gloom. We can either give
the world our kindness and joy or our fear and anger.
God in His wonderful love sent a
little pup to show Jason once again that we can reflect our love, warmth, and
light even in Winter’s darkest days.
