“Never let the sun go down while you’re still angry.” -
- Ephesians 4:16
Fifteen year old Mandy came home late
from school in a foul mood. She’d picked
a nasty fight with her boyfriend; well at least he was before the
argument. He claimed that he had no idea
why she was mad at him . . . which was in fact the reason she was angry. Boys can be so insensitive.
Her daily chores would have to wait until tomorrow; way too
upset today! Stomping into the kitchen,
she faced her furious mother. After the
day I had today, she can’t possible expect me to do those mindless household
tasks, she thought. Mandy mustered an
annoyed-look right back. "What?" she snapped.
"Don’t use that tone with me Amanda,” Mom warned. She used Amanda’s legal name when she was
really pissed at her. “You’re
nanoseconds from being grounded!"
"Whatever." Sara muttered in her best “I-don’t-give-a-crap
tude. She threw some dishes around in
the sink, trying to make as much noise as possibly. A plate cracked, her hand bled, she swore -
loudly!
Mandy’s mother shouted lividly, "How dare you use that
language! Go to your room!" But Mandy refused, throwing down the towel
she’d used to wipe blood off her hand. Mom
slapped her, harder than expected. Mandy
cowered, staring at her in disbelief; she’d never been struck before.
"I HATE YOU!" Mandy screamed before running from
the house. Mom followed – remorse
tearing at her now. “Mandy!” she
screamed, chasing after her.
"Leave me alone!" Mandy cried, darting across the
street. I HATE YOU!" she yelled
again and continued running . . . until
she heard a blaring horn, screeching tires and the thud of flesh on metal. She turned, hoping it wasn’t what she knew it
was.
People crowded around the lifeless body lying broken in the
middle of the street.
"NOOO!" she screamed pushing through the crowd,
kneeling by her mom. "Oh God, Oh God
. . .” she wailed, sobbing so hard it hurt. She couldn't believe the last words she’d spoken
to her were "I hate you."
Anger effects your heart.
When we’re angry, it’s hard to say things like, “I’m Sorry . .” or, “I was wrong.” It’s a lot easier to say cruel things like,
“I hate you.” Rage destroys trust,
relationships, and ultimately people you love.
Sometimes it can be reversed, but not too easily.
The moments when I’ve successfully avoided anger are some of
the best of my life. Not only did I
avoid crawling back to offer my apology, but I avoided the fear about getting
hurt again, the bitterness that results in holding grudges, and the intolerance
which leads to hostility and physical suffering.
Lord, I’m finding that You alone can break my fall. Soften my heart when anger flares so that I
might avoid hurting others and losing their trust. Help me to count more
blessings, and to call attention to the best things in others. Amen
