“All things work together for good to those who love God." ~ Romans 8:28
When his phone rang late that
night, Lucas immediately knew something was wrong. His life was about to change and he was
powerless to stop it.
Terrible fall - catastrophic brain injury, irreversible cessation
of all brain functions. He was in the ICU;
unlikely to survive the night. It hit Lucas
hard, partly because he’d conveniently forgotten he even had a father. Alcohol and pills stole him more than a
decade earlier.
They needed a miracle.
The 13-hour drive would provide ample time for prayer and begging God
for another chance. So, the journey
toward forgiveness began.
Painful childhood memory played unfettered
like a damaged cassette: anger, sadness, relief, regret, self-loathing, guilt. To worship and fear someone at the same time
made for real confusion.
He said his goodbyes and before returning home, decided to
visit a beach. He’d never seen the ocean
before.
Lucas didn't care that the sand was damp from an earlier
rain. He sat down and let it soak through his jeans. Then he took off his
shirt and faced the waves to a rising sun.
A breathtaking seascape had cast its spell; every sense elevated
to a higher awareness. A warm breeze
caressed his eyelids; the ocean's music filled
his ears with crashing waves and the cries of gulls. Lucas relaxed, intoxicated by the breath of Mother
Earth and all the wonders she held.
Suddenly, he could hear his father laughing at him for taking
a baseball to his chin off the top of his glove. It stung at the time; he'd thought it cruel
that his father found it so funny. Now
that hearty sound was a treasured memory.
Hot tears sliding down his face felt both horrible and beautiful.
His dad left scars that would never fully heal. But Dad was a human being, and we are all
flawed. The story of fatherhood is not
about the last page, it’s about the paragraphs in between. It’s about how the emotions of love and
protection, of fun and cherishing the moments are conveyed to one another.
Only time will tell, but Lucas will
continue to search for the positive memories and attempt to excavate and
abandon the nuggets of anger still buried deep within. He knew that forgiveness was the only path
toward peace and acceptance for who he was, who he is, and who he wants to be.
He’d prayed for a miracle … and
he found it surrounded him.
Father God, in a world where so many are
struggling to overcome addiction, we pray that Your grace will draw them from
their slavery and give them new dependency - trust in Jesus, who died for all
who believe and, in Whose name, we pray.
Amen
