“If you need wisdom, ask God. He’ll never rebuke you for asking." ~ James 1:5
For Westerners, coming of age
brings to mind quinceañeras, sweet sixteens and bar mitzvahs. In China, Zhuazhou
is held before a child even takes its first step.
For centuries, a Chinese baby’s’ first year passed cautiously
due to the country’s high infant mortality.
Reaching its first
birthday was cause for celebration.
But, Zhuazhou isn’t an occasion
for grand feasts and elaborate gifts. No
invitations are sent out; relatives and friends arrive spontaneously with modest
gifts: food, coins, simple toys. The
custom dates back to the Song Dynasty (960-1279) as a means for expressing good
wishes and reflects how the elders will encourage the child’s future.
There’s an old Chinese saying: "You
can know a child's future when he is very young." Feng Zikai chose a Chinese brush pen at his
Zhuazhou (or “birthday grab”) ceremony. His family encouraged him to study literature and
he became a famously influential writer.
For baby Wang Li, his big day
had arrived with much anticipation.
Zhang, his father, placed several objects carefully on the floor
while guests gathered to watch. Whatever
item Li picks up and gives to his parents might signal the child's future
career or personality types.
A book, calculator, pen, currency, stamp and ball of yarn
were carefully arranged so that no item was unfairly attractive to the boy. After several adjustments, Li was finally
allowed to peruse each object while his anxious parents waited patiently.
He touched the calculator and skimmed over the book cover. Grabbing the pen next, he examined it thoroughly. Seemly content with its weight and shape, he unexpectedly dropped it also. Neither the cash or stamp received any consideration.
He’d already rejected writer, financier, business executive,
entrepreneur and party official.
The last item had been selected for its blue color which represented immortality and optimism. He drooled on it briefly before turning abruptly and crawling back into his father’s arms without any object.
Tears flooded Zhang’s eyes - tears of profound joy. He hadn’t realized that he was one of the choices. Everyone in the room began clapping for Li's choice.
According to Chinese
tradition, he was destined to become a humanitarian - one who cares about others
and the alleviation of suffering; a man gentle and compassionate.
As the most critical part of the celebration was over, Li’s
uncle brought out a birthday cake. Amid a
chorus of the Chinese version of "Happy Birthday," the little
birthday boy passed another hurdle in his life's journey.
Did you ever wonder if your "good" choices are "God's" choices? That they’re
the ones we do from a sense of love and duty for others rather than for self? God’s will for our lives is more obvious than
we may think.
