“Your flesh and heart may fail, yet God remains steadfast." ~ Psalm 73:26
Thoughts of being in the room with
a dying person made him nervous. But Tony
promised his Grampa Phil that he wouldn't leave him; that he’d never die alone.
Driving in this morning, he’d worried about what to
say. Those who spend a lot of time with
the dying tend to say you don't need to say much. So, he let Phil talk and at times, shared the
silence.
Simply being in the room seemed
to be enough. Just a touch of his hand,
being there to pass some ice chips, or softly stroking Grampa’s hair was all
that was needed. For Tony, it was his
final gift to a man that’d been more like a father than his own dad.
Phil’s breathing became quietly shallow for a few minutes before
he took his final breath. For those like
his Grampa who lived life with compassion as his paramount principle, dying was
but a transition into another way of living.
The first thing Tony did was nothing. He didn’t run out and call the nurse or pick
up the phone. He took a deep breath and
absorbed the enormity of the moment.
He felt honored and privileged to be in Grampa’s presence in
the moments after his life on earth ended.
Phil knew he was dying, so his being dead was no surprise. It wasn’t a problem to be solved. It was very sad, of course, but Tony felt no
cause to panic. Strangely, it didn’t
feel weird.
Sitting by his bedside, Tony wondered what might be
happening for Grampa right now? Was it
possible that these were the most profound moments in the murky hinterland
between life and death? What other spirits
were here that might be supporting him on his way? Perhaps he’d seized a cryptic opportunity to
stay with Tony briefly and comfort him before transitioning on his way.
Tony sat alone for five minutes, or maybe ten; pausing to
give his soul a chance to adjust. He
knew he’d never get this time back again; time to accept and adjust to its
finality.
Time moved sluggishly. Eventually, he called a few people who needed
to be told and initiated systems that needed to be connected. But Tony would forever remember this gift he’d
been given.
Ultimately, we know very little about what happens when
someone is dying. After 5,000 years of
medicine, we can tell how you die but not what happens next. It’s enough for me to believe that a loving
God has an eternal plan, revealed only after we enter His magnificent Kingdom.
“Holy Father, let me live for You every day bestowed
upon me, yet when my time comes, when dying sits before me, when my breathing
becomes a sporadic rasp, look beyond the physical and see that I am in the arms
of Angels. Amen” ~ Angela Abraham
