“Earn respect by doing your best to live at peace with everyone." ~ Romans 12: 17-18
For the second time this month, her daughter came home from school in tears and Carolyn seemed helpless to stop it. She’d been so happy in middle school. But that had all changed. Something about this seemed frighteningly familiar as her thoughts drifted back to own childhood experience.
Carolyn’s story began in elementary school where she made friends with six little girls. The seven soon became a clique. By middle school, the clique had become more like a pack. They only dressed name-brand clothing and wore their hair exactly the same way (long and straight). They called themselves Heaven’s Seven and scoffed at other girls who couldn't (or wouldn't) act like them.
Heaven’s Seven became experts at exclusion and cruelty, terrorizing both kids and adults. Teachers and administrators were aware of their intimidation but were powerless to stop it.
Parents were thrilled by their daughters’ popularity. Carolyn’s mom even had Heaven’s Seven T-shirts printed for the girls to wear at their eighth grade graduation.
Though she belonged to Heaven’s Seven, Carolyn felt trapped. She knew it was wrong, but didn’t have the courage to confront her friends about their bullying or to leave the security of the group.
The effect of her complacency bothers her to this day. She paid a heavy price; one of guilt and fear. She’s not the same person; she’d never treat anyone that way now. But while these experiences lay in her past, she’s the mother of three young daughters. That plants her right back in that circle; learning how to maneuver girls and friendships and personalities.
As she trudges up the stairs now to comfort her sobbing tween, her heart aches. She knows from past experience that people can be thoughtless, cruel, and . . . even mean. But her children are so very lucky. Her past is their prologue.
Her kids enter new situations assuming only one outcome – wide smiles and ample hugs. They’re blessed with a Mom that understands the meaning of integrity, the value of compassion, and the courage to help them through it - lessons learned the hard way. So help her God!
The start of a new school year is, for most, a time of excitement at seeing old friends and making new ones. However, there are some kids who see the first day of school as a day of execution . . . victims of bullying because they’re different.
Lord, protect those who are teased physically, verbally and online as well as those whose self-worth seems tied to making others hurt. We pray for those who think they’re alone; those whose hope is disappeared. Help them Jesus. Strengthen them. Show them your love. Amen
